Anyone remember that blip I posted weeks back about being the daughter of Morbious?!? That was weird, but since then it''s been added to...more blips of info here and there about not having a choice in the matter, being some sort of vampire royalty, and just little things that weren''t part of anything else. Messengers coming in the night, between sleeping, between dreams.\r\n\r\nAnyway...\r\n\r\nLast night I was attacked by a group of vampires. Nothing new. It started out in the outskirts of Vampire City, but for the first time it was sunset, which threw me. I didn''t get where I was at first; there''s never been light before. Anyway. I was walking through this beautiful little neighbourhood, when a group of four or five gathered behind, following me. I was approaching a church, and some voice out nowhere said, "go inside where it''s safe"...so I did. Was a little odd that everyone inside the church was black; at the same time in my heart...I feel much more comfortable around a black congregation then I do a white one...less uptight I guess. The group from the street followed me in, but waited in the wings.\r\n\r\nI don''t know why the situation raised my instincts, but it did. I knew I was in a ''not good'' position. I suppose it was just a sense, and the way everyone watched me walk around, like they knew something I didn''t. I was looking at the stained glass windows of angels...all getting darker, and darker, as the sun quickly set outside. I needed to get back outside...get out of what I knew was now...Vampire City. I felt cornered in the church. One door after another, and just lead into another large room...as is typical architecture in the city. One way in, and lots of no ways out; god for wearing out the tourists! \r\n\r\nIn the long run I was trapped, and I don''t remember much at that point cuz my human nature gets into this frantic, focused on escaping mode, where I''m moving so quickly through walls, and sets, that I''m not at all paying attention. I was cornered and there was a guy (the head guy from the group) that was bitting into my neck...in this intense embrace. Point is...it felt good. Most, I remember how completely relaxed my body felt, how I haven''t remembered feeling like that for a long, long time. I was into that feeling, but at the same time I was sure I wanted this guy off me...but I couldn''t raise my arms to push him off. My body was so limp, and sedate...I couldn''t do anything. I managed to shift my weight to get away, or..he finished?!? I''m not sure. Either way...the common theme the last few months has been the same....the catch me, and I get bit, or ''changed''. The only reason this is strange to me is bcuz the last six years that I''ve been dealing with vampires exclusively...I''ve always managed to get away unscathed.\r\nno longer.\r\n\r\nAll my experiences prior to this one...I''d come to just as I was being bitten...this time I didn''t, and I went through a profound change in energy. It wasn''t immediate/all at once, but it was quick, and in definite stages. First my body became incredibly hot...and where moments earlier had been drained/tired...I suddenly had boundless energy, but not an all over the place, static energy...it was sharp, and solid, and was pouring into me as quickly as it was pouring out, and it didn''t take long to factor that this energy could be utilized/wielded to accomplish *anything*. I barely even thought that I wanted to get out of the church...and I rose up with incredible strength and speed, crashing through these massive beams and woodwork overhead. Normally I morph through solid object, which requires that I twist my vibration one way or the other...to synchronize myself with whatever I''m moving through, be it earth, stone, wood, whatever. It doesn''t a take a lot of effort, but some. This move required none. There was no merging to be done by me...and even if the roof of the church had wanted to change it''s vibration to avoid being torn up...it was too slow. I was soaring upwards through into the sky, as if I had wings. Huge wings with a span of 20 feet. It was amazing. It was like...I "had" to use them. It felt good, and normal, and free. Except...I didn''t really have wings; when I looked there was nothing there, but......I could feel them!\r\n\r\nI was flying so fast that my clothes were tearing off my body, and I was naked when I landed.......in what felt like the ground of some massive palace. I flew there directly without thought...as if returning to someplace familiar. Maybe the way someone with amnesia eventually finds their way home? Anyway.\r\nWhen I landed I wanted answers. I remember I was insistent about that...I was loud, and going on in a funny and commanding tone..."First of all...I''m dreaming, I''m out of my body, and this is Vampire City...correct!?!?! I''m not stupid! I want some god damn answers! I want to know what''s going on, right now!!!" silly.\r\nThen, what appeared to be a homeless, crazy old man walked past me mumbling something. I didn''t catch it, but I knew it was for me....."What? What did he just say?!?" No one answered. I caught up with him and stopped him..."What did you just say to me?!?" He threw me a glance over his shoulder, and then turned away, and simply said again..."If it comes from heaven...what matters about how it appears?" and he walked off. I''m still rolling that over in my mind.\r\n\r\nThe rest is strange. There was a coronation in my honor (post manifesting some clothes) and lots of extraordinarily happy people walking around whispering and staring. I wasn''t too into what others were doing. I was consumed with this feeling of empowerment that had nothing to do with the exterior goings on, but was a spilling out from inside me. At the same time I knew things without thinking. I knew the plague of ''my people'', their sadness and woes, their struggles. I knew there was something that interfering with their simple way of life.\r\nI knew I was key...in solving that....in setting things right.\r\n\r\nI also kept checking to make sure I was me, which sounds strange, but I wanted to make sure I wasn''t becoming someone else. I also keep checking to make sure I was alive...and not dead. So, I kept opening eyes, moving limbs, etc. but..it was me. I was being lead here and there in automatic mode as all these various thoughts ran through my mind. Eventually I was lead into some huge open arena...something like one would see in India I guess. A massive square, where people gather to listen to great minds, pray, or something?!? There was a sea of people waiting (I could see them through the sheer curtains that made the backdrop for the stage). The entire thing was being televised, and there was some dude on the stage...all dressed in white...something like a televangelist who was readying the crowd. There was no fear, no anxiety, and strangest of all there was ''absolutely'' no sense of intimidation or DOUBT in my mind about me, about what I was doing.\r\n\r\nI remember a woman standing beside me, pointing up at a set of surveillance cameras backstage. I didn''t know what they were for, but I through up my middle finger, and gave a big, cheesy grin...and in the middle of this guys sermon......the crowd erupted in uncontrollable cheer. They went nuts! So, I was being watched...all the time, everywhere I went...I was the "news".
I guess I was supposed to wait for a cue to walk out, but I didn''t. I walked straight out onto the stage, and grabbed some small guitar like instrument from the orchestra that was near the back...and walked up to the guy in white and stood beside him. I through him off, but it seemed his talent was in juggling things like that. A con artist...I knew right away. Playing the audience, and spewing bullshit. Those were my thoughts about him, but again...it came without thinking. I just knew. Every single person I looked at...I just knew them inside out.\r\n\r\nHe tried to play me into his spheel, but I wouldn''t allow it. I can''t remember exactly what I said, but I kept it clean, and simple...I know that. I know the people loved me. They were conditioned to embrace me, but they loved me more then that; then what was conditioned. Like...they ''knew'' me also. Like, they''d been waiting for me for a long time....something honest, and intelligent, and trustworthy. Something for them.\r\n\r\nI walked off stage early, and proceeded to walk around the entire grounds...healing people, fixing stuff. From the little bits I gathered from the opening ceremony...it was big talk about a "new world"...about new construction of new cities, and more opportunities, and increased perfection...and more happy times...yada, yada, yada. Out with the old and in with the new world order. But...none of resonated with me. I walked around repairing the ancient structures...old statues, and temples, homes, and tea gardens. It was hands-on healing in a neat tai chi sort of dance....swinging my palms around and energy just pouring and shifting things back to their original state. I healed people I was drawn to. Normally...with hands on healing I can do two, maybe three a night...but I must have repaired at least a dozen people, and a dozen more structures.\r\n\r\nI should note that the majority of people in the palace area were Chinese. Not sure why that is?!?\r\n\r\nAt one point in my walking around...I stumbled upon another ceramony....some large party of people in park, also being televised. They were surprised and welcoming, but the female m.c. was a bitch. I remember at that point I was playing around, having fun with myself....I changed my outfit at will. I made my hair long and tussley. I made it red. At that moment the women walked up with her microphone in hand and was laughing at me, telling me that red wasn''t my color. So, I changed it blond...and she laughed more, bcuz the spot lighting over-headed made it look green...I got the same feeling about her that I did the other guy. An insecure, bullshit artist. It''s not so much that the patheticness made me want to crush them. I didn''t feel an ounce of aggression in my body. I just wanted to suppress them in sight of everyone. I wanted to make it clear that they were idiots...and not at all people that should be listened to. I changed my hair color to match hers...and the crowd laughed, when she said it was ''mousy'' and still unflattering against the lighting. So...I blew out all the lights with a swing of my hand, and everyone shut up. Now it''s just silly details, but fun, and exhilarating! I just spent the entire night fulfilling this new obligation as Queen Whatever.\r\n\r\nI woke up and went to the bathroom, and feel back to sleep and picked up where I left off. I woke up several times, and each time I feel back asleep...it was the same position.\r\n\r\nIt was all very cool. And also disturbing since I still always have that deep questioning about things. Is it a ploy?!? Am I being played?!? I can''t say for sure. Although, I will admit whole-heartedly that it''s a VERY attractive position...to have irrepressible, unwavering power over most everything, and at the same time know that I do posses the understanding to not allow myself to be tricked by it...or allow it shift control where I''m being enticed by it...into something other then I believe it is. Something like that. That I can utilize it wisely.